should i just let it go? (what would you do?)

Ladies, we’ve all seen it.

The line snaking out of the restroom.

I eyed this one, watching people shift around, hoping their bladders would hold out. Those at the back rummaged their pockets for snacks–it was going to be a while.

The opposite door had no line. And I really had to pee.

Now, I’ve commandeered the empty restroom before. But I always waffled over it before tentatively entering.

This time I boldly walked in, thinking, “Ha ha, Suckers!”

Because it was the women’s restroom.  

You see, I was in a testing facility taking my professional engineer’s licensing exam and it was one of the scheduled breaks.

That was about 20 years ago. In Mississippi. There were so few women in that space we all could’ve used the restroom at the same time.

It’s the first time I’d EVER seen the lines flipped…but it was definitely not the last time I was one of the only women in the room.

Decades living that experience taught me what’s wrong with a lot of workplaces today.

I’m grateful for what I learned but I wouldn’t want to go back.

And yet…

Every two years around this time I have a choice to make: Do I keep my professional engineering license?

I haven’t used it in a long time. My business doesn’t require it.

But still…I’ve had a hard time letting it go.

Maybe because I worked hard to get it? Maybe because it isn’t really that hard to keep it active? Maybe because what if I have to go back to it someday?

Now, it’s been so long since I’ve practiced, it would be irresponsible of me to use my stamp at this point. So that last one is pretty ridiculous…but the disaster monster in my brain likes to bring it up sometimes anyway.

I think it’s tied more to my professional identity than I like to pretend it is. It has a certain cache, being an engineer, that’s kind of nice. And having the credential definitely increased my confidence when I started my own business.

So, I could just keep it. I still have time to finish my continuing education and renew my license before the deadline.

On the other hand, I think it’s keeping me too tethered to my “normal” career path. The one I felt never really fit me, no matter how hard I tried. And I think that’s holding me back.

So, what’s the point of all this?

When you make a big career shift, your professional identity will change. Which can be exhilarating or unsettling or both.

And fear of the unsettling part might keep you from doing something amazing.

But the truth is, you don’t have to give up everything familiar and comforting right away—or ever. You can keep it around for as long as you need.

And you get to decide what to do about it and when (and if) it no longer serves you.

As it happens, writing this email helped me realize my PE license is less a help and more a hinderance to what my goals are now.

So I’m going to let it expire. It’s time.

Have you ever let something that felt like part of your identity go? I’d love to hear about it. Hit reply and let me know!

Totally relieved to have made that decision,

Kristen, PE (for another two weeks)